"Latter-day Divorce And Beyond" Reviews
“You hit the target with great precision on every topic you addressed, your knowledge of the pain of divorce and the joy of relationship rings true…you enhance your opinion with scriptural references that are strongly correlated…” J.
“My husband and I (second marriage) really enjoyed your book. We both experienced the pain of divorce and the stigma it seems to have in our LDS culture. It is refreshing to have someone with your obvious gifts from the Lord and insights to bring hope to many broken-hearted Saints.” B. and S. Hunter, UT
“I recently completed your book and am re-reading it a second time. You give some very good practical advice and you tell it how it really is. Thank you for writing a book for Singles that are still good Latter-day Saints!” K.
“I am currently going through an annulment because of domestic violence which ended up in a two-year protective order against my current husband. Had I just read your book and heeded to one-tenth of what is said in its contents, it would have saved me and my beautiful little girls three months of misery…” R.
“I just finished reading your book and loved it! What a refreshing and realistic approach to the ever-sensitive topic of divorce. Your humor and wit was balanced with the seriousness of the material covered…” T.
“Wow, is all I can say about your book….Also, I have talked with my Stake President about my struggles being single and widowed and if he will read it, I’ll will loan him a copy of your book. I think it should be a must-read for every…single member.” N.
“Your book has been a source of strength and encouragement to me and I plan to buy a copy for both of my daughters…I have enjoyed your humor and insights into the struggles of being a single LDS person.” G.
"I wanted to write and express my gratitude for your book. Thank you. Your book is just so on point. I am grateful for the insight that I have gained from it. After reading the sections "Describing the Feeling When Souls Merge" and "The Spiritual Encounter of Two Becoming One," I just wept. The emotion from years of being in two bad marriages, and combined with the hope of truly finding an eternal mate, was just too much to contain. Your words have given me tremendous hope and tools for the future." D. Littlefield, NV
"Ms. James hits the nail right on the head with her direct and somewhat humorous insight into the reality of divorce within the LDS world. She described almost word for word what I have been feeling for the past 3 years since my divorce. Her book helped me to finally get the closure I needed, to look at myself in the mirror and take responsibility for my own faults, and it helped me to find the motivation to move forward. I highly recommend this book to anyone who might be going through or has experienced a divorce. It is a most positive influence for good! P. Meadows, NV
"This book manages to meld the secular and the spiritual parts of a divorce and the subsequent attempts to get back into the dating and mating game. It has a great deal of relevance to any LDS who are divorced or even contemplating divorce. It is a guide through the minefields of dating and finding an eternal partner. Ms. James takes the reader gently by the hand and shows the reader to where the road runs true. This book constantly seeks to use scriptural references to illustrate the path and shows how one can still lead a proper and spiritual life even in the midst of the pain and anguish of divorce. I had thought that the natural end to divorce was to move away from your faith. Ms. James shows how to use the lessons that could be gained there to become closer to God." M. Fortuna, NY
"Latter-day Divorce and Beyond" Excerpts “You are seeking a union with someone willing to work with you, work well within the confines of your faults and his/hers, who is willing to communicate easily, and be emotionally available to take it to the next step: emotional/spiritual union. Without all those caveats in place, without those guarantees tested by time and weathered trials, you might as well stay single!” Chapter Four ~ Toxic Traps in Relationship, pg. 80. “The divorce experience distorts our world view. We’ve been injured. We bring shades of our own intimate “colors” to a reality canvas, desirous of building a validation for what we’ve experienced…. We desire, with all our heart, to believe we are still worthwhile after the years of disappointment with our mates. The truth we yearn to discover is the truth that is needed to support our particular views and show the world that we tried. We fought the battle. We’re still good people. We still matter. We want validation…. One of the worst snares we face as divorced Saints is that feeling that we “gave at the office.” In other words, we are so emotionally depleted from the many years we just went through in dysfunctional marriage, we feel entitled to the next relationship being much easier. If you feel that way you may not be ready for a relationship and you’re probably in “want” mode.” Chapter Five ~ Some Relationship Concepts pg. 152, 168. “It has taken a bit of time to work through the feelings of betrayal that plague us after “eternity” lasted only a few years… We have deep reservations concerning the fragility of eternal commitments. It takes time to cultivate the trust and hope necessary to face the epitome of covenants once again. In spite of ourselves, in spite of our humanness and natural-man inclinations, we yearn to couple ourselves with someone whom we can adore and will adore us with a resolute, unbridled passion and dedication. Is that too much to ask, given our current station in life? No! ...What Jesus is teaching us when He says that to lose ourselves is to find ourselves, is the willingness to develop a sensitivity that puts your partner’s needs above your own. The charge here is to be willing to give to your partner what he/she needs, and not what you conveniently want to give them.” Chapter Nine~ Cultivating the Celestial Relationship, pg. 229, 234, 243.
“I’ve attempted to give voice and form to a growing population of Latter-day Saints who have long been considered an embarrassment within the confines of the Church culture. Yet, the spirits who drink from the crucible of divorce are indescribably brave, and often exceedingly worthy. These members have lived to face emotional tragedy and hardship that would crumble lesser people. I am proud to be associated with many divorced Latter-day Saints who fought long and hard in a relationship tht would not improve, but would try their souls to the very limits of their endurance.” Preface
